***

back in 1863
— 13 years after california
(which had flown the bear flag
as an independent republic
for twenty-six days)
became the 31st state of the union —
a guy named ed manet
made a painting called olympia

many have considered this painting
the first work of modernity

for chuck baudelaire
formal qualities aside
ed had taken up the challenge
to depict contemporary life

for clem greenberg
subject matter aside
ed had taken up the challenge
to explore anti-illusionistic space

for me
looking at the work over a century later
i was struck
at how the subject gazed back
at the viewer

the subject was a model named
vicky meurent
it turns out she modeled
for nine of ed’s paintings

and you have to wonder
if ed was the first modern painter
or if vicky was the first modern model

this extraordinary eighteen year old
(18 february 1844)
was a subject
who allowed the viewer’s gaze
by her own conscious choice
but only
as the no longer
privately voyeuristic viewer
accepted her gaze in return



californium is a collection
of extraordinary californians
who gaze back

californium is an eclectic collection
of californians:
a little volleyball
a little postmodern architecture
the occasional scuttling
of an illegal whaling ship

californium
is a collection of explorers
who live on the western-most coast
on earth
who search
i think
for truth

bruce murray’s truth
of the origins of our solar system

philip zimbardo’s truth
of the institutional forces
on individual behavior

iris chang’s truth
of atrocities we would rather forget

david wilson’s truth
of the corners of the human mind

herman atkins’ truth
of his own innocence

i am very grateful
and very indebted
to these marvelous californians
for their generosity
for lending me their image
for giving me their time
for allowing us
some small gaze into their lives
they have all been most generous
a few of them even fed me
in every case we had amazing discussions that inspired me and challenged me
to live up to a higher standard